Attract What You Want By Being What You Want

A lot of us have a list of ideal qualities that we would like in a romantic partner -and I do believe it is important to get clear on our relationship values (must haves & dealbreakers) so that we can stay in alignment with what we desire to create.

Before we go out in the world and look for someone who has the qualities we want, it’s imperative that we make sure we fully embody those qualities ourselves – since we will attract someone at a similar level of consciousness. We need to show up that way FIRST, regardless of how other people are showing up.

If we want someone who is “loving”, for example, we need to basically be loving to ourselves and fully embody this “way of being” in our lives with everyone and everything we come into contact with, regardless of whether our partner has entered into our experience yet.

The more loving we are, the more we will attract people, situations, and circumstances that mirror love back to us. The outer world mirrors our inner world. Everything starts in our own consciousness. Think of it as an energetic magnet.

We also need to be as loving as possible to ourselves in order to create a safe space within and show others exactly how to love us.

A Course in Miracles says: “Only what we are not giving can be lacking in any situation” – so the next time you wish someone would be more loving, try being really loving to them regardless and see what happens. I promise you it will shift the dynamic.

I have realized again and again that whenever I have felt that my needs weren’t being met in any relationship, it’s usually because I wanted something I wasn’t fully giving myself. For example I wanted to feel heard and understood, but I wasn’t fully hearing or understanding my partner/parent/boss/friend.

Once I got clear on what qualities I would need to embody to show up as the best version of myself, I attracted people who also embodied these qualities.

Do you know your “must-haves” and “can’t stands/dealbreakers”? Who do you need to become/what qualities do you need to embody to become the person who can receive such a relationship?

Practice showing up embodying these qualities every day and I promise you, your life will start to shift. 

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