I am currently in a deep alchemical process of processing, healing, and integrating deeper layers of past trauma. Life is our greatest teacher and my life is no exception. I will share more about it in detail soon. But one really important takeaway that I am seeing clearly is that we need to learn how to meet and hold all parts of ourselves: the light, the dark and everything in between and not only meet these parts but learn to hold them and love them as they are merely disowned parts of ourselves that need love to heal.
This “darkness” in our psyche (that we all have variations of) is evidence of a survival pattern of thoughts and behaviors that we created as young children in order to be loved and accepted in whatever environment we were in at the time. These parts of us are trying to “get love” and love as a young child is associated with our actual survival so it is vitally important.
As adults, more often than not, we continue to play out the same patterns of behavior that are literally wired in our brains from what we either experienced or witnessed as children. When we experience a real or imagined threat in the present moment the logical reasoning part of our brains goes offline and the survival brain is what runs the show. We literally re-create the same dynamic/energetic that we experienced in the past which only perpetuates the trauma and creates more pain.
The reason this happens is that our bodies store emotional energy from past experiences and our bodies want to release that energy so that we can alchemize and heal. We will keep recreating the same thing so that this energy can come up and be processed, healed, and released. This same energy if left unprocessed can create dis-ease in the body.
We need support and SAFETY in order to truly look at what is coming up and be with it. Allow ourselves to fully feel it and let it be without trying to push it away or change it. Only then can we actually move through it. We need to be with it first and even love it. This is how we create unconditional love WITHIN ourselves first and then attract people who love us unconditionally in the outer world because our outer world (life circumstances) will reflect our inner world (our minds/belief systems).
One of my soul sisters reminded me we are literally “having tea with our demons”. Once we sit with them and get to know them intimately there is nothing left to fear. Once they have taught us what we need to know they don’t have to be as loud. They just want love. That darkness within us wants and needs love. Practice being with yourself in the darkest places when they come up. There is nothing to do. Just BE with it. Thank it for trying to protect you all of these years.
Of course this can sound daunting and scary and this is why you don’t need to do this alone. I would never have gotten to the point where I can tolerate this practice unless I had the support of so many beautiful angels (coaches, soul family, therapists) along the way.
As we clear out this old energy something miraculous happens. Space is created for something new. A new story. A new way of thinking and being. Deeper connection and true intimacy with self which leads to deeper connection and intimacy with others. It is the work of a spiritual warrior but it is so worth it.
If you are ready for true liberation from your patterns and programs I invite you to book a call with me HERE.