We have been sold a bill of goods in our society that tells us that when we grow up and find a partner and live happily ever after. It’s the theme of almost every Disney movie and rom com we have ever watched and this messaging gets into our subconscious mind and many of us have been wandering from relationship to relationship seeking that perfect fantasy that doesn’t exist.
The idea of perfect or finding “the one” that fits perfectly with us without having to do any sort of inner work or navigating is what often keeps us stuck in patterns of expectation and disappointment and conveniently not having to look at the role we are playing in this repeated pattern of going from person to person or expecting one person to meet all of our needs.
Allow me to burst this bubble which may seem harsh at first (but will actually lead to the opportunity for deeper love, connection and intimacy!) – There is no perfect partner except temporarily or momentarily. There IS a perfect opportunity for us to see ourselves in relationship to another human being and become aware of the places and spaces where we are getting tripped up on repeat, where we are not yet free, where we can unlock and heal old emotional energy from past experiences that is being triggered in the present moment.
The closer we get to another person the more our own internal landscape (beliefs, past experiences, past traumas) will be reflected back to us through the dynamic. This is actually for the higher purpose of our own evolution and liberation because as we become aware of these places we have the opportunity to tend to them and free ourselves enough to start to create a new story.
We have an opportunity to see and know ourselves in a way that we wouldn’t if this relationship dynamic did not exist. There are no accidents. This opportunity is in front of you for a reason and that is the perfection of all of it.
Instead of seeking the perfect partner or perfect relationship can we be open to the perspective that it is a co-creation, that we can always adjust and that by meeting ourselves and the other person with love and compassion over and over again (especially when it gets messy) that that creates the space for deeper love and connection and expansion for everyone involved?
This is what I teach and it’s an absolute game-changer.
If you need some support, let’s connect: